Flashy flash game?

Hah, my 4th blog post, already?

A friend, stepped on my foot, and, I'm 'lucky' enough for him to be fat, so my run tomorrow is either going to be painful, or not going to be at all, which is a shame, since I really enjoy running, the thought of not running faster than old people and then farting, just gives me the chills.

http://www.kongregate.com/games/MostroGames/days-of-monsters
Days Of Monsters is this new game on Kong, after playing it sometime, I can say it was very..

No, I'm joking, it was pretty good;
Your were supposedly picked on by other kids, and you became a mad scientist to avenge those dreadful kids. (duh..)

Well, you built a 15-feet giant monster, you're ready to start destroying some cities.
You destroy some stuff, you smash some people it's delightful.

You get to buy more parts with your money from the killing-sprees, somehow :O
The upgrade system adds lots of replay value, overall, it's a decent game; 3.1/5

There's this 'white-night' in a major city where I live, I can't wait to go, you basically stay up all night, in the city, everybody's doing it, there'll be shows and concerts throughout the night, and the day after, there's the all-famous, 'water-fight' day, you splash everybody with water! It's going to be pretty epic.

Some funnies, to brighten your day..

"I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car."

"I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness."

"Your mamma is so fat, when God said let there be light, she had to move!"

Yo mamma's so fat, when she went to the beach, the whales sang "We are family!"

"Poor guy
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!""

thanks for reading, come again :)

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Another day, another nickel.. wait what?

So, if you don't know me, and you don't (I hope, lol) I'll tell you a little about myself;
I'm broke

That's the gist of it, really.
Well, I'm 16, what'd you expect, but there are a few jobs available at McDonald's.
I was trying to get into there, but since I'm still 15 and 11 months, I couldn't, they have a strict policy, which they added THIS YEAR, about age, 16+ or no job, gah..

A bit annoying since my cousin actually got in there, at 15 and 1/2, why is that? No cleavage, no job? Life. Go figure.

But no matter, I'll get a job (eventually) for now, I'll just stay broke, it's not that bad, really.

Game reviews :]
Well, since my computer is one crappy machine (not that bad, but compared to normal computers, who actually get NO LAGS from flash games on Kongregate, I'd say, it's pretty bad..) I play MOSTLY flash games, now, I do play some older, lighter games, but a review about 'Portal' wouldn't be so up-to-date, now would it?

http://www.kongregate.com/games/Alex_SpilGames/snail-bob-2
Well, Snail Bob 2, I finished 1, and saw this one on the top rated for the week on Kong, the enjoyment came immediately afterwards.

Snail Bob [2] is a light, easy-going, spare time, play-while-you-pretend-to-be-working, kind of game. I enjoy this sort of game because you don't really have to put every brain cell working on it, it's a fun game, yet it's not that heavy on the ol' brain-box. Snail bob 2 is a puzzle game, but they really made it pretty easy, I solved most of the puzzles pretty easily, yet it still gives you that lovely feeling of accomplishment when you finish a puzzle (or the whole game).
Lovely game, lightens up your day! 3.6/5 :)

This morning I went on my daily run (more like 3 times a week-run) and it was so hot, I actually felt I was melting, mid run, I had to stop to drink some water, as I dozed off into a public garden, I was awoken by the smell of poopy diapers, gummy-bears, and single moms.

I 'ran' to the drinking fountain only to be out-run by a 12 year old fat kid, he started drinking. And he drank, and drank, and drank, until he couldn't drink anymore.
I guess the moral here is fat kids can really drink, pun intended.

A few funnies :D

A Really Bad Day
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

Birds and bees
A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in.

“Mother, where do babies come from?”

The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug and have sex.”

The daughter looks puzzled so the mother continues, “That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommy’s vagina. That’s how you get a baby, honey.” The child seems to comprehend.

“Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddy’s penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?”

“Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry.”

Need smaples
An old man goes to the doctor for his yearly physical, his wife tagging along. When the doctor enters the examination room, he tells the old man, "I need a urine sample, a stool sample and a sperm sample."

The old man, being hard of hearing, looks at his wife and yells: "WHAT?"

"What did he say? What's he want?"

His wife yells back, "He needs your underwear."


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